When the worst case scenario IS the scenario, resiliency planning is a lifeline
A month or so ago, we learned of exciting changes coming to our group within Microsoft. I was SO excited for the change, for the new team members, for the leaders joining from another area that I could mentor and be mentored by, for the new customers I’d have an opportunity to serve. At the time, it was always a possibility that the merger would result in people leaving as well, including me. Early in my career, I’d have just told myself “be optimistic, don’t even think about that possibility”. Obviously I was confused about what being optimistic really was about :)
The week before the change was to rollout, I facilitated a retrospective with my team. We discussed how to prioritize where to put your energy with “circles and soup”, I taught them what it meant to be proactive (thanks Covey habit #1), and we did a resilience building exercise to practice proactive responses to mentally and emotionally difficult situations that could be coming at us. I had no idea at the time how much I personally would be leaning on the work I had done to prep for the meeting to come to terms with my layoff a few days later.
I’ll be honest, this work did not prevent lots and lots of tears and anguish. It did not keep me from wondering what I had done to deserve being laid off. Nothing, I had done nothing to deserve it to be clear and now I have finally internalized that truth! It did not prevent me from panicking about my family’s finances. It did not stop me from mildly catastrophizing if I’d ever find another job in this crazy market. As my mother-in-law says, I “would have to die and be reborn” to react differently. I’ve had 40-some years of being an overly anxious perfectionist and people pleaser, with only ~10 years of therapy and professional coaching (I cannot recommend Carol enough) to develop the tools and skills to thrive despite my natural tendencies! It’s now been just over a week since I was laid off, and 30 year old me would likely still be an emotional disaster panic applying for every role I could fill even if I didn’t really want to do the job or work for the company.
50 year old Angela is still a little disappointed to lose daily interactions with a team she had invested so much of herself into building trust and strong relationships with. Frustrated to have had to move out of role she truly loved and was so proud to be part of, and where she was truly hitting her stride. This Angela also knows that those relationships can be maintained, and that the experience was valuable and can come with me to future roles. I also have the tools that I developed with my coach during my sabbatical in 2023, that will help me use my new found love of mission based work with state and local governments to refine my job searching and hopefully land a new role that I can be just as proud of and excited by.
That’s it. Nothing new or particularly ground breaking to share so I hope you were not looking for the magic bullet, I don’t have one. However, I am happy to connect with you on LinkedIn if this resonates and you’d be interested in learning more. We can setup some time to chat over Zoom if you want to live collaborate, network, brainstorm, or just vent a little. I am a great listener, and a masterful “yes, and”er. Currently I have plenty of availability, and as an extravert I am always energized by human connections.
Oh, and that super adorable picture is my dog Sadie, enjoying a walk in the rain with her favorite yellow raincoat, quite a valuable resource during stormy times.
